SORRRRRRRY!

The title of this post is two-fold. ONE: I am sorry we haven't posted anything in the last couple months. And instead of saying the standard, "We've just been so busy", even though we have been, there is actually a more detailed reason. I (Laura) have been writing a lot for Jesus Culture and have been tackling some other topics besides Marriage. (*WARNING: Shameless plug coming) You can check out my writings, as well as many other talented writers at http://new.jesusculture.com/posts/category/resources/. SECOND: Today's post is about forgiveness and inevitably saying sorry. It's not fun is it! It takes a lot of humility to say sorry. I was not always a good apologizer. I was veeeeeery slow to say sorry and not before I gave the silent treatment and projected my guilt onto my husband. HAHA (not funny)! What changed for me? Several things. One of the biggest reasons saying sorry has gotten easier is Love. We love our spouse and we also choose to love our spouse. What do I mean by that? The end result in any offense is reconciliation if you choose Love and make it your goal. One of the biggest opposers to reconciliation is self-preservation. In saying sorry we are admitting that we failed at something and that we must change. Our self-preservation instinct kicks in and we decide this isn't a big deal or the other person's need for an apology just isn't that important. Love is the opposite of this. Love is putting the other person before yourself. Love is putting your need to preserve yourself aside and putting the need of your spouse at the forefront. Love is a choice to humble yourself with the goal of bringing reconciliation to the relationship. A lot of times we think we are better or stronger when we don't say sorry. It actually takes even greater strength to say sorry. A person of great character can recognize the bigger picture. The bigger picture is that ultimately you want your spouse to feel valued, respected and loved. You don't want an offense lingering in your relationship because you know it affects every aspect of your lives as a couple and as a family. I've found in my personal experience that the quicker I say I'm sorry the less time we spend angry at each other. Life is too short to spend a moment more being angry. If you need to say sorry today just do it! Value love and reconciliation over self-preservation and watch the healing that takes place in your marriage!